goals.

my goals for this week:
[ ] make chamber choir
[ ] do well on my semester tests
[ ] spend time studying things i need to; mainly, spanish, especially the speaking portion
[ ] don't spend to much time studying, and avoid worrying
[ ] stay out of any end of the year drama

my goals for this summer:
[ ] play belegarth
[ ] play ultimate frisbee
[ ] go camping
[ ] hang out with friends
[ ] hang out with family
[ ] listen to music
[ ] go to shows
[ ] go to LOLLA!
[ ] have adventures
[ ] write
[ ] start singing lessons with anna
[ ] take pictures with heidi
[ ] stay out late
[ ] drive to an unknown destination
[ ] find cool places to hang out
[ ] play with sidewalk chalk, bubbles, etc.
[ ] have a water fight
[ ] spend lots of time outside
[ ] find a job... o.O
[ ] drive up to cedar falls to visit jordan!
[ ] see nicole!
[ ] send letters/packages to my friends that are living at camp for the summer
[ ] go to/have parties
[ ] work on starting the "community"
[ ] avoid drama.

human nature

it is human nature to want to better yourself.
therefore, it is human nature to crave accomplishments.

everyone wants to be the first;
everyone wants to be the best;
everyone wants to be the most origional.
at least to some extent.


the problem is, this natural feeling is often taken out of control.

we will use extreme measures to reach our goals.
we step on those below us.
we claim things that do not belong to us.
we lie; we cheat; we steal;

sometimes, we hurt the only people who are still rooting for us.
sometimes, we take responsibility for words, actions, or accomplishments that were not ours at the start.
sometimes, we lose sight of what's important.

sometimes, we forget about all of the things we actually have accomplished.
sometimes, we forget about how we've gotten to where we are.
all of that ends up not even mattering anymore.
it is when that happens, that all of our real accomplishments cease to exist.

change.

sifting through my cluttered mind
searching for the answers
i want to bring about change,
but i'm not sure how

you'll be leaving in the fall
hopefully all goes well
i'd hate to see you turn out like all the rest

working at their third rate jobs
grocery isles and convenience stores
it seems they've already given up

part of me still has hope
they can make it if they try
but it's doubtful that they'll make it on their own

when everyone's given up on them,
who do they have left to turn to?
no one will even give them a second glance

sifting through my cluttered mind
searching for the answers
i want to bring about change,
and i think i know how

what's been going through my head.

In 4 months, you'll be in college far away, and that's all I have to say.

you've got your whole life, don't you throw it away.

walk on, cause you can't go back now.

the greatest feeling.

you know that feeling you get when you're having a really great, meaningful conversation with someone?
you feel like you have a really strong connection with them, even for just a second, even if you've barely met.

i know the feeling.
it's one of the best in the world.

i wish i could feel that way more often.