Defining one’s self.

I believe there is no one defining point in our life, but life is a process in which we find ourselves. It begins with childhood and continues on until our death.

Childhood is a crucial time in which we develop right from wrong. Everything seems black and white as a child. There are two ways to do things, the right way and the wrong way. By our parents’ guidance, we are taught to rely on a certain set of morals they’ve lain out for us.

As we grow up, we learn that not everything is how it seems. Things are much more complicated than black and white, right or wrong. Some begin to question those morals our parents set for us. Some rules we break, some rules we continue to follow.

During the teenage years in when you really become to shape who you are. You take everything you’ve learned from your childhood, and you decide how you are going to use them in your life. This is when the most crucial mistakes are made. You learn that some seemingly unimportant rules really are needed. Luckily, you eventually learn from your mistakes, however many you may make. Your teenage years are when you find out what works and what doesn’t.

Now, it’s after this that things become fuzzy. I haven’t actually experienced this process any further, but this is how it seems to work.

As a young adult, you are put through the final test. You discover whether or not the morals and guidelines you’ve adapted for yourself throughout your teenage years actually work in the real world. You still make quite a few mistakes, but because you’ve learned so much throughout your teen years, you know how to deal with it. You continue learning from these mistakes. You come up with what seems as a fool proof set of morals. They work for the person you are, the person you’re happy to be.

Not to say that set of morals won’t change slightly as you mature in adulthood, you’ll surely discover new things, but for the most part, you have developed who you are as a person. Adulthood now gives you time to discover who you’ve become, how you work. You become very wise and can pass your wisdom down to others.

I don’t think you ever truly know who you are. Some people have a much better idea than others, and you will come to know yourself better than anyone knows you. All of this reminds me of something Mr. Nichols said to our class at the beginning of the semester. He told us we didn’t know who we were yet. He also told us, he had yet to discover who he really was. Now, some students had quite a problem with this. They couldn’t quite grasp the fact that they didn’t know who their own self was. This sort of confused me as well, but I knew these were words of someone much wiser than myself. After thinking about it, I’m come to the conclusion that he’s very right, and I’ve began to discover what his statement actually means.

I’m not saying I’m right about any of this. I’m not saying that at all. This is more of a theory I’ve come up with. I’m sure this theory will change and develop over time, but for now, this is what I’ve come up with.